Monday, May 19, 2014


Well, hello there. Long time, no see. Well, I have had another baby. Levi Phillip and he is 2 weeks old. Emma will be 3 in August. How time flies huh?

I've had some pretty serious insomnia (like 1-3 hours of sleep total each and every night) since the beginning of the year so my doctor wrote me off of work for the last 2 months. Now I get 8 weeks of maternity leave. Needless to say, I've been home with the kids a lot. I do love it and I am considering quitting my job to be able to stay home full time. The problem is that I feel like a complete failure as a mother and wife staying home all day. I feel like nothing gets done around the house because I have a 2 year old to chase and pick up after. I feel like I don't have enough planned activities for her to do and she gets bored. That's not fair to her. Now I have a newborn who is literally attached to me all day. We're still in the blissful sleep-all-day stage but that will soon change. With him literally needing me to survive it makes my days very long. I feel like I'm doing a good job balancing out my time between the two kids so Emma doesn't feel left out, but that's about the only thing good I'm doing. Nothing gets done around the house and I have a pile of laundry the size of a small island on my bathroom floor all sorted waiting for it's turn in the machine.

I had this grand vision of what it would be like when I was able to stay home. I was planning an activity for the kids each day, one household chore a day, and just picking things up to keep the house tidy. Boy was I wrong. Although I make sure all of the dishes are done and I vacuum my living room darn near everyday, my house needs dusting, I see new cobwebs in the corners and dangling from the ceiling daily, I need to mop my tile floors, laundry is piling up and waits clean in the dryer until we're ready to wear it, our kitchen island is a drop zone for stuff that doesn't have a home, and our clutter seems to just move it's way around the house to out of sight places. It's driving me crazy. I did find several lists for stay-at-home moms online that attempt to give you a schedule to follow. I really liked these and wrote them down in my planner. I do my best to follow these lists but still haven't been able to make them a daily habit yet. I'm doing my best, but it's not quite good enough yet.

What is your biggest household challenge? What do you do when you feel like your best isn't enough?